S.Y.K

Holiday Greetings

So You Know

S.Y.K.

Revenge of Eve

YO, Yo, Yo! It’s our favorite day of the week but this Monday is different because all most of my lovely followers are off for Memorial Day!! Gotta love a holiday weekend 🙂

– Happy Memorial Day –

Monday just happens to be my day off and it is no surprise it is my fave. The bonus is learning about fellow bloggers through the series S.Y.K.!

If you aren’t familiar with how this works, just follow a few simple steps and give your readers insight into the person behind the scenes – YOU!


  • Answer a few question by creating a post on your site or you can answer in the comment section below. Answer all or a few, its up to you.
  • If you create a post, link back to this week’s S.Y.K. post. Don’t know how? Let’s chat and I’ll walk you through it.
  • My only request is that you be honest with your answers.
  • Have fun. Be silly or serious – whichever fits the tone of your site
  • Be you because that’s who we want to learn about.

This Week’s Questions

  1. What is your favorite part of summer?
  2. Do you swim in bodies of water that are questionable? Like where you cannot see the bottom – lakes, ponds, the ocean… if so, what’s is your fear in doing so?
  3. What is the average temperature (Fahrenheit) of summer in your area?
  4. Do you have access to a pool? If so, is it your own private pool or a complex pool?
  5. What ocean is closest to you?

See, that wasn’t so bad! I can’t wait to read your answers and pin your location on a map that I have decided to keep close by to have a visual of where my blogging friends are located.


So You Know- Revenge of Eve
So You Know

My answers to last week’s questions:

  • How long have you blogged? What is the anniversary? I began blogging on July 15, 2017. I established my site on the 30th of May but had no clue what I was doing and so it sat for a little over a month before I decided to revisit it. I consider the 15th of July the anniversary of R.O.E.
  • What was your original purpose for beginning a blog? To be the author of my story. I had met a customer whose wife died from bulimia and when I asked about her, expecting him to tell a story related to her personality, he told a vague life story that did her no justice. He told the story of a woman abandoned by man and taken over by disease. In that very moment, I made the decision to share my story. It is one of struggle but it is mine. The efforts, the setbacks, and the victories all belong to me.
  • Did you research about blogging before establishing your own? None whatsoever and I am so glad that I did not. I would’ve never started. After a year of blindly blogging, I decided to search for blogging tips on Pinterest and let me tell ya…information overload. Too much out there. I am grateful I am self-taught because that is something I am proud of and no one can take it from me.
  • Has your purpose evolved or changed directions? If so, what was the determining factor for the change? Oh lord has it?!! I am easily distracted by shiny, new promises and that is where research landed me. Given too many options and I’ll forever struggle. I like a little bit of everything but my why behind blogging, in general, has stayed the same. From time to time I add things, take ’em away, quit, pursue but inevitably, my purpose is for others to know that they are not alone and I emphasize the importance of sharing your story whether that be in a journal or a blog, regardless, do not allow someone else to say who you are/were. You tell it!!!
  • What determines your measure of success as far as blogging is concerned? I have to agree with many of the bloggers who participated in this series of questions and say it is the interaction with others in the community. The feedback, encouragement, and engagement are far more rewarding than any number will ever be.

I cannot figure out why the above text, some of it, stays high lit. In order for it to be bold or italicized, I highlight it and click the b or the I. The first question and answer worked perfectly but the others…I’m over trying to correct so I will publish. I noticed it did this in last week’s answer section as well. Any suggestions or solutions? I am all ears!

5.19.19

Mental Health & Recovery
revenge of eve

Waging War

Her words

her ammo.

Pain

her battle.

Branding her

war’s cattle.

The depth of

wounds

sear her soul.

Armor so heavy,

slicing her

flesh.

Onlookers

smell

defeat

without

a second

glance.

A woman

forced

to war,

as society

cast stones.

Fatigue she wears

to honor

her

struggle.

She fight

to earn a spot.

To hold her space

in this

fucked up

place.

So You Know (S.Y.K.)

Personal Growth & Goals

S.Y.K.

So You Know is a weekly series of random questions meant to give the reader insight into the blogger behind the screen. Participation is easy!! Just answer a few or all of the questions below in the comment section or publish your own post. Don’t forget to pingback to this weeks post so I can check out your answers.

See? Easy, peasy!!

So You Know- Revenge of Eve
So You Know
– Not sure how to create a pingback link? That’s okay!! Chat with me and I’ll walk you through it –

This Week’s Questions

  • How long have you blogged? What is the anniversary?
  • What was your original purpose for beginning a blog?
  • Did you research about blogging before establishing your own?
  • Has your purpose evolved or changed directions? If so, what was the determining factor for the change?
  • What determines your measure of success as far as blogging is concerned?

My answers to last week’s S.Y.K.

  1. Do you see a therapist? If so, how does doing so influence your life? I have recently began seeing a therapist, again. My track record with them has been 2 for 5..and I am on the 2 of the five. This is my time seeing a therapist in private practice. All of the one’s prior have been in a clinic setting and were seen on an emergency basis. I was in crisis when I search for therapist who takes my insurance and I am extremely lucky to have clicked on the one I did. We have only had one session but I already know she’s the one for me. She was sent to me for sure!!! Not sure why but I’ve never disclosed all of my “ugly” to my therapist and yet when I sat with her, it all came gushing out. Even the things I’ve not ever said. For the times that I’ve had success with my therapist, the impact has been rewarding and validating.
  2. What is your favorite part of adulthood? Your least favorite (besides bills)? I suppose the only joy in adulthood for myself is being able to say that I am an adult although I do not feel like one. The freedom of it is nice but the extent in which I feel free is limited because I live with my Ma. It is only recently that I’ve began respecting her home as a place to live. Previously I treated it as a hotel of sorts. I would stay out with friends all night only coming here to shower. I have lived with her and my sister off and on my entire life yet I never “lived” with them. I never fully unpacked my belongings or stayed around long enough to have family time. I would come and go with my hours of operation opposite of theirs. During the school year my hours would be more predictable due to being on my daughter’s schedule.
  3. Are the government officials of your country trustworthy? I pled the fifth. I have no opinions when it comes to politics but I will say Louisiana is known for its crooked politicians.
  4. How important, scale of 1-10, are leprechauns in the evolution of humans? 1-of least importance 10-required Being that I am a second generation immigrant, my dad is from Belfast, I would say 10. Without those wee fellas I am afraid there would be no me!!

R.O.E. 411

R.O.E. Need To Know

Last month I thought my WordPress plan was set to renew but that is only done when you have a card on file. My plan wasn’t due to expire until the 30th of May and while I had the money to renew last month, I decided not too for a few reasons.

Revenge of Eve
  • I am unsure of which plan will best suit my needs for the next twelve months
  • I have not decided on my set plan of attack for selling my memory keeping journals and journaling packets
  • I haven’t weighed my options about the benefits of having a paid for plan verses a free site considering I do not have a plan mapped out for selling things online
  • I have missed too much work to invest in something without seeing a return immediately
  • My only fret is that my design layout will be affected and I am not so certain I will invest the time to get it how I want it due to when I do decide having to invest the time on the new site
  • I have stepped back from blogging and reading blogs daily to avoid burnout
  • My personal life needs attention
  • The domain remains mine because it was purchased separately and at a later date from the plan so I do not fear the loss of it
  • I want to be more intentional with all I do from here on out
  • Direction, routine, and scheduling are things high on my short list of priorities and sticking to them is my biggest priority
  • A free site is suitable for the time being and forces me to establish an action plan in regards to my desires to work from home
  • I am unsure if I want to air my personal life in the same space I want to develop a professional relationship with customers
  • I may use a free site for personal and launch a professional site using a paid for site…the problem there lies not being able to transfer my following to my business site but having my followers on my free site allows them the choice to follow if my business is targeted at their individual interests
  • I’ve attempted operating two sites before and one suffered and the other never quite took off but in comparison to beginning my first site, it did well
  • I do not want to abandon my R.O.E. as my web persona but I also want to be respected professionaly
  • I have no clue what direction I want to go in professionally speaking
  • I am working on a few projects so my time is limited

Did I say a few reasons? Lol… It’s more than a few and I need more time to sort things out. The purpose of this post was to a. receive feedback and suggestions from my loyal followers b. to have my thoughts/questions/concerns listed out for reference c. to inform y’all that the overall design of R.O.E. is soon to change due to the fact that final decisions have not been made. Free themes are limited to chose from and if I am honest, I’m not pressuring myself to invest the time it takes to design a website without knowing my next move. If you have any insight into the operations of the WordPress business plan, Etsy, or Shopify please let me know your experience in the comments. Or do you use a self-hosted platform? If so, how much behind the scenes work is required? It is difficult and much more time consuming? Any feedback is great feedback!!

Revenge of Eve

S.Y.K

Personal Growth & Goals
Revenge of Eve

Guess what today is…..

It’s MONDAY!!! YAY

And the crowd goes wild..

Hopefully, you’ve realized such because, by the time this post is published, the work day will be ending 🙂

It’s none other than you know who – Candace – here for your weekly dose of So You Know. Never participated? Never fear, the guidelines are posted each week. Ready? Ok, good… Here we go…

  • Every Monday I will ask 1-5 questions.
  • You can answer all or just a few
  • Topics range from surface, general topics all the way to in-depth personal topics.
  • To participate you can either answer in the comment section below or create a post on your site and link back to the week’s S.Y.K. post. Don’t know how to link back? Chat with me and I’ll explain how.
  • Last but certainly not least – be honest!

The purpose of S.Y.K. is to give your readers insight to the person behind the blog ❤

As for my answers… you will find my answers below the week’s questions from the previous week’s questions.

Easy enough, right?!



  1. Do you see a therapist? If so, how does doing so influence your life?
  2. What is your favorite part of adulthood? Your least favorite (besides bills)?
  3. Are the government officials of your country trustworthy?
  4. How important, scale of 1-10, are leprechauns in the evolution of humans? 1-of least importance 10-required

That’s all of this weeks version of So You Know and below are my answers from last weeks questions. * read with caution – trigger warning – talk of suicide

How was your weekend? Honestly. I am writing this the same day last weeks so you know goes live and my weekend has been hell. I came close to committing suicide, I….realized the truth in the saying “we are not our thoughts” and it has impacted me.

Describe the clothes you are wearing now. Is this your normal Monday attire? My normal Monday attire is the most comfortable, stay at home and relax type of outfit imaginable.

Revenge of Eve

Do you work a 9-5 job? No, I do not. I work the weekends, holidays, and early in the morning. On average I have two/three days off a week. My job is physically demanding and is reaching the point that I prepare to change careers.

Who do you look like, your Ma or your dad? My dad. Blah.

A Little Diddy for Mom’s

Life & Relationships

Revenge of Eve

Hold and cuddle them while you can.

Before you know it, it is you they cannot stand.

Wipe their noses and butts,

Help them out of ruts,

Watch as they drive you nuts!

Eyes that once glowed with pride

Go on to swollen and full of tears.

Before you know it, you question

“What happened to all those years?”

You do your best not to pass on your fears.

You give them room to grow.

But we aren’t taught how to cope when our daughter becomes a ho

Or our son an abusive asshole

Or a drug addict,

Or Gay

But, HEY! At least you get ONE day!

So to all the mothers out there…

Don’t think you are alone in a world of perfect moms because none of us have it figured out. All you can do is be the best version of yourself and if anyone wants to judge you for that, fuck them, wink back.

Writing Myself Well

Mental Health & Recovery

I’m Not Well

That is the most honest statement I’ve written. I am not well. It is taking everything in me at the moment to type these words. What happened? Nothing specifically but enough to leave me in my bed going on a week now. This post won’t be full of frill or begging for sympathy. I am just curious if it is possible to write myself well.

What does that mean? I’m not sure but I do know I love my blog and this community. I apologize for not responding to any of the comments and I will get to that soon. Currently, my hands shake as I type and I want to close my laptop. I may. I may not.  I don’t know what to say. I am learning that just because I do not want to be bipolar, does not make me not bipolar.

I’ve had a manic episode for approximately nine months now. That’s a long time to be up and my plan is to not be down that long. But here’s the catch. I don’t have a plan. Oh but wait! I am working on one. I see a new counselor on Monday. I am here, writing and I plan to touch base at least once a day. What I write is all dependant on how I feel. I will try to be social but at this point, no promises. I consume myself with others as a distraction from working on myself. I’ve said this for years but the reality of it has slapped me in the face. It hurts. I am hurting.

What does writing myself well mean? I don’t know but I am at the point I will try anything. Over the past two years, I have slowly come to understand that I am worthy of life. Even typing that confuses me because I have learned it but find it hard to believe 100%. Who determines…I have a million questions that will never be answered. I’m not hoing to waste anymore time on those. I want to be better.

I’ll admit there have been times when being sick was easier than putting in the work it takes to get well but that is not the case this go ’round. This time is different. What’s even harder for me to understand is the number of people who believe that being this way is a choice. Why on Earth would anyone choose to live this way? How is this my fault? How do I stop it? I’d rather not exist but instead, I have this and a life that I have been given. For what I have yet to discover. But I, like you, have a purpose.

Revenge of Eve

I Chose Life

Mental Health & Recovery

Today I was on the verge.

The verge of suicide.

I wrote my note.

I looked for the gun –

It wasn’t there.

Luck?

I’ll never know.

It was the calmest I’ve been in a while and even I commented such, out loud.

My guardians, I called upon.

One by name.

A decision was made

No bother to reach out.

Attention is all that would stand to gain.

I sent my I Love You’s to the four that matter.

None of this fuck’n matters

Replays over and over in my head.

The realization that I’ve played a role, one assigned to me, is a harsh reality.

Why wouldn’t they give me a glamorous one?

There is no time for blame.

Ironically, those who ask

What’s wrong

are the ones that aren’t ready to see their part in your shame.

Expectations to be a no-body carries a weight.

One that I must shake,

For my life is at stake.


#PaperChaseLovesList: NatStatWeek: Day One

Creative & Collective

#PaperChaseLovesList

Today’s hashtag is a mouthful! From the website National Stationery Week dot com, today’s challenge is sponsored by Paper Chase –

Paperchase is the UK’s number 1 shopping spot for exciting and innovative design-led stationery. For over 50 years we’ve inspired with stylish stationery, unique greeting cards, distinctive gifts as well as quality art and craft materials.”


Challenge

From a top ten of the UK’s favourite crisps to your simple task list on a Monday morning, Paperchase loves writing lists – especially with the store’s selection of creative, colourful, crafty and premium notebooks.

They say that your notebook is an extension of yourself and, with so many notebooks available, you can display your personality through the pad in which you take your every day notes.

Partnered with a perfect pen, your lists can be beautiful, bulletted or bold.

Paperchase will be creating lists of their favourite lists – including stationery – during National Stationery Week and will be encouraging stationery addicts to do exactly the same!


My Five Favorite Notebooks

Choosing five of your favorite notebooks may seem a simple tasks to you but when you are a #stationeryaddict like me, it is next to impossible to do.

I decided to choose ones based on a variety of reasons. One was chosen for its aesthetics and surprisingly great paper, another is my most expensive notebook to date. But enough of the spoiler!! Let’s have show and tell!

The first notebook has been in my collection for about two years now and of all of my notebooks, 20+, this one is my favorite all around. The subtle grey lines that rule the paper are perfect for a clean look. The durable cover is what sold me on this spiral beauty. Speaking of spiral, the coil is gold and I love me some gold!!!

Character and trend art are not really my thing but I couldn’t resist this magical unicorn. The charm and gold and the quality sold me instantly. The icing on top of this deal was the price tag. I paid under $10 for it! Gotta love T.J. Maxx. I’ve not seen another but if I do, I will scoop it up! The company who made my #1 notebook is Mara-Mi and the line is Zoomerang. I’ve not found any others in this line but would enjoy seeing what other mystical creatures make up the zoo.

Top: #1 fave Bottom: geometric design

The next one I chose I did so for the geometric design. Another notebook made with a durable cover and there is something different about the type of paper used. I can’t quite put my finger on it but I want to say it is smooth to the touch. The only thing that I do not care about is the weight of the paper. It is on the thin side which allows for the ink to be seen on the back of the page. I refuse to use the backside of paper if there is bleed through.

Pictured above are two notepads and I decided two of those would equal a notebook and it adds variety. The teal spiral pad with a C on it was purchased around Christmas time from Stage for $10. It was on sale for 50% off (originally $20) and I would buy it a million times over. I wish every notebook I owned had the kind of paper this notepad does. It has a grit to it. Like grain feel and it is thick without allowing ink to bleed through.

The other small notepad pictured is designed to look like that of a waitress pad. It is a to-do list with thick sheets of tear off paper.

Left: Clairefontaine Right: Write Notebook

The flimsy looking notebook on the left is my Clairefontaine Seyes-ruled notebook ordered from France, literally. When i decided to step up my stationery game, this is the first notebook I purchased.

I am not a fan of the cover so much. It doesn’t seem as durable as I prefer but I have never put it to the test. The paper is amazing!! Seyes-ruled pages is this company’s legacy. The faint shade of purple grid-like lines has been used in schools across France for many years. I have previously written a review of these two notebooks which I published on NYAC.

The notebook on the right is manufactured in the United States by a school bookbinding company named Write. This notebook has a sturdy kraft cover that comes from the series of New York Burroughs.

The red band that acts as its closure is an actual rubberband that is completely removable. I like the originality behind that and find it to be a great way of branding. This notebook is the most and only masculine notebook that I own. I prefer the more frilly and full out girl designs.

Other notebook talk

There is a thing about the ruling of paper that I am picky particular about and that is the ruling. Dot and grid paper seem to be all the rage today and I must admit, college ruling is where it’s at. I have discovered I like the lighter shades of grey or blue for the color of the lines but sometimes that isn’t an option. The ideal ruling color would be the light purple Clairefontaine offers but we haven’t got there yet in the stationery world. Plus this may not be the preferred color of many but it is mine and that’s who we are talking about today!! Lol

Before we go, I want to touch on the thickness and texture of the paper I choose. I use marker pens and if they bled through I am left with half of the pages. I refuse to write on the back of a page where you can see other writing. I equate thin to cheap and that isn’t the case when considering Japanese paper products but that is a whole ‘nother level of stationery. The texture I like is a smooth surface unless I am using a pencil and the I choose a rougher texture of paper.


That about sums it up for my favorite notebook talk. I hope to participate in this week of stationery hashtags but sometimes, a lot of times, life is busy. I didn’t plan as well as I should have to say that I will but I can say that I will try!

How about you? Do you have any particulars about notebooks or paper that you must have or things that you refuse to use? Do you love stationery like I do? Am I crazy? Don’t answer that one!! Have a great day everyone!!

Revenge of Eve
Revenge of Eve

So You Know – S. Y. K.

Life & Relationships, Personal Growth & Goals

It’s me again! And it’s Monday again… Booooooo! I’m back today with your friendly So You Know series and a little chit chat 🙂

Due to problems beyond my control this post will publish a day later than it was intended

Yesterday in the United States we celebrated Easter. I believe if you are Christian this holiday is universal (don’t quote me on that). Easter is my family’s favorite get together and this year’s events went wonderful! The kids enjoyed their bag’s full of goodies and the food was to die for.

Let’s roll out this week’s questions.

As with each S.Y.K. post, the guidelines first.


I like to keep it pretty simple around here so here are a few things to keep in mind while participating:

  • There are no right or wrong answers… Your answers = Your opinion = Your life
  • Answer a few or one, whatever you are comfortable with
  • Pingback to any S.Y.K. post
  • Use the hashtag #SYK to tag your post
  • Be real. If you feel a certain type of way, say it. You were asked your opinion (double dog dare ya!)

Extra info.

*A number of questions will be asked. At least 1, no more than 5.

*Questions will range in subject from cherries to prostitution.

*Participation will consist of you creating a post on your website, listing the questions and responding.

*Pingback to any SYK post

Don’t know how to create a pingback? Hit me up and I’ll tell ya how. It’s easy and everyone needs a little help here and there


Pretty easy, right? Give your readers a little insight to who you are and participate in S.Y.K every Monday!


Today’s Questions

  1. What is your favorite holiday?
  2. Are there family traditions that you continue each year?
  3. Have you started any new fun things that your family does each year as a tradition? If so, please share! (Family does not have to be by blood – close friends count too!)
  4. Do you remember how old you were when you discovered the holiday mascots (Easter bunny, Santa, etc) weren’t real? Got a story that goes along with this discovery? Share, please!
  5. Which is your least favorite holiday?

Last week’s Q’s and my A’s

  • Do you take responsibility for other people’s problems and/or emotions, unknowingly? I do and am trying to learn how not too. You can’t deny that energy exists and I pick up on people’s emotions through an energy field. This is commonly referred to as an empath. For myself, it is torcher. I cannot discern between mine and others and I go through phases where I can block from feeling others energy and phases where I cannot. As of late, I cannot. This has a bad impact on day to day life and I struggle keeping my head above water. I wake feeling a certain way and by time I have encountered two or three others, I process their feelings and make them my own. I do not feel responsible per se but I do feel it is hard to communicate if the energy is heavy.
  • When did you realize that this behavior was burdening you and stunting your growth? Was it a particular incident or did someone point it out that it isn’t your responsibility? I was told by a counselor that the way others feel about me is none of my business and it is a reflection of them, not of me. I took that and from there realized that I am not responsible for their feelings and also realized that doing so was negatively effecting me. This is when I put together the relation I have with energy and other people. Call me crazy but it isn’t anything I haven’t been called before.
  • Were you raised by giving parents or parents who gave only to throw it in your face later? I don’t think they ever gave only to throw it in my face but when it was/is convenient to apply guilt to a situation, it is definitely the go-to, ” after all I’ve done for you..”
  • Lastly, what are your opinions concerning parents being held responsible for their children’s actions? At what age are children to be held responsible for their own actions? Is this reflective of how you were raised or the opposite? In my opinion, children’s actions reflect that of their parents responses. But there is a responsibility as a parent to teach our children consequence. There is a grey area where teens are concerned because many children act on emotion. I think it is important to hold them responsible for their own actions from the moments they enter this world but as far as crimes are concerned, the laws should never bend to trial a child (17 and under) as an adult. Although the crime may be heinous, they should still be charged in the youth grouping. And as terrible as it would be to see my child suffer at the hands of another child, I am still more understanding of that verses an adult molesting a child.
  • When children act out it is because they seek attention. They find a way to make you respond and albeit negative or not, attention is attention. They are most likely to be experiencing difficult times at home or at school with their peers. Sometimes it’s hard to get kids to talk but if you watch them, you’ll discover what it is and from there it is the adults choice of how to guide them through those times. Children mimic adults and perhaps when they are acting out, we should look within ourselves and see what it is we are showing, not telling, them as their role models. My Ma was adamant when it came to respecting us as people and so I believe this to be a reflection of how I was raised. If you don’t like what you see in your child, maybe you should make some changes in your life. That’s what I had to do and it wasn’t easy but well worth it.

And that’s my story and I’m sticking to it!!